In the end, what we truly believe is revealed not by what we know, but by how we love.
I have a friend who often wants to talk about controversial topics and conspiracy theories. This person is far from an ignorant, extreme person with baseless accusations — they are incredibly intelligent and thoughtful in their analysis.
But I’ve realized I want to focus my attention on love, because when love is not the center and the focus of things, everything goes wrong and heads in the wrong direction. It’s fine to talk about all kinds of subjects, but if they’re not based on love — if love isn’t the core and foundation — then nothing else really matters.
I wanted to get some advice from my son on how to communicate this to my friend in a gentle way, and also to encourage him, without pressure, to consider focusing on love too. During our conversation, my son said, “Well, love means different things to different people.”
I replied, “That’s fine, but I’d rather talk about what love means than all these other topics — because love is the foundation, and the most important, primary thing. Everything else is secondary, tertiary, or further down the list.”
But that conversation got me thinking. We don’t actually have to spend endless hours debating what love means to different people, because love has a remarkably consistent meaning for everyone.
We don’t have to wonder what it is — we inherently know. The real question is: Are we living it? Are we loving?
Love Across Traditions
When I looked at the world’s great religions and philosophies, I found something striking: they all say essentially the same thing about love. They call it by different names and emphasize it in different ways, but the qualities are nearly identical — kindness, humility, patience, compassion, generosity, forgiveness, caring for the vulnerable, and putting others before self.
Whether it’s metta in Buddhism, bhakti in Hinduism, compassion in Taoism, ren in Confucianism, mercy in Islam, or neighbor-love in Judaism — the heart of love is active, selfless, and relational.
Radical Love in Christianity
Christianity takes this to an even deeper place: love your enemies, pray for those who persecute you, bless those who curse you, feed your enemy if he is hungry. This is love at its most radical — not just loving those who love you back, but showing compassion to those who oppose you. And Jesus lived it to the fullest, loving so much that he gave his life even for those who rejected and crucified him.
Without Love, We Are Noise
The Apostle Paul carried this truth forward when he wrote that even if you could speak with the greatest eloquence, understand every mystery, know all things, give away everything you own, and even sacrifice your life — without love, it amounts to nothing. Without love, even the most impressive actions are just noise.
So love is the foundation. Love is what matters. It runs across all cultures, all religions, and all philosophies. Without it, things go wrong.
It’s what we should focus our mind, body, and attention on before we get consumed with other things. If you’re not living a life of love and feeling love in all of its fullness, then — as Paul said — all the other things are just clanging cymbals and resounding gongs. They make noise, but they mean nothing.
Here’s Where to Start
Begin with the love you already have. Use it today — smile at people in the grocery store, strike up a friendly conversation in line, give a genuine compliment, visit someone who is lonely, help a neighbor, hold the door for someone, or simply take time to really listen.
- Smile at people in the grocery store
- Strike up a friendly conversation in line
- Give a genuine compliment
- Visit someone who is lonely
- Help a neighbor
- Hold the door for someone
- Take time to really listen
Make Space for the Source
And as you keep living out love in these small ways, you’ll find it drawing you toward the source of love itself — the well that never runs dry. Make space to connect with it: be still, turn off the noise, step away from your phone and TV, breathe, pray, meditate, notice the life within and around you.
That source will fill you and deepen your love, so you’ll have even more to give — not from effort or obligation, but because love has truly taken root in you.
When love is the foundation, every other conversation, every other pursuit, every other topic will be transformed. And you won’t just be talking about love — you’ll be living it.
Focus on love first — let everything else flow from there.